Mark Souder Wants to "Renew His Walk With God".
"I'm sick of politicians who drag their spouces up in front of the cameras rather than confronting the problems they've caused", said the 59 year-old Republican representative today.
Hey, Souder! Guess what?
We're sick of seeing politicians get caught in affairs with staffers and then bore us with their sordid "I let God, my wife, and my constituents down", standup comedic routines. (Those who cheat on their wives while she endures cancer, and lie about producing a child within the extramarital affair aren't any better).
Hey, politicians, keep it in your pants, already! But, I guess they're just immortal beings too, after all.
Souder plans on submitting his resignation to House Speaker Nancy Pelosi this Friday.
Watch Souder's emotional and guilt-filled press conference here.